Monday, December 27, 2010

Starbuck during the blizzard... looking at a picture of myself.

I tweeted about this yesterday but I wanted to share in detail what happened with me and a stranger names Sean yesterday.

So I'm out in the snow storm, because I want to be and because I'd rather be out nowadays instead of in my apartment with my thoughts (I'm learning that I do better when I'm busy), and I take a seat at starbucks with my tall, soy, no water, no foam, chai. I take forever to get adjusted because I have on like 5 layers of clothes. I sit and take out my laptop to get some work done. I get into a groove of answering emails and promoting and BAM... A man who works for the city, I think he works with trash, sees me like he was looking for me for a while, sits down and proceeds to tell me about a woman who was extremely rude to him in the bathroom line. He's in the line for a while, ut then goes in but checks a text message. As he is answering the text message, the woman behind him in the line, bangs on the door. He explains to me that he addresses her warmly and says *in the most suzie home-make voice* "Someone is in here, I will be right out". He uses the bathroom, washes his hands and leaves the stall. While he is leaving, the elderly woman interrogates him as to why it took him so long. And according to Sean, she was badgering him. He said she said "what if there were feces everywhere??"

Now, he started the conversation with things that are pleasant and likened all of that to what ia Godly and likened the opposite of all that isn't pleasant to what is unGodly and he starts talking about the wrath of God and immediately my face changed to... "uuuuhm you on that BS".

He sees my face and asks about it and I told him that my experience of God is nothing like that. I don't know of a wrathful god, full of rage, jealous, mad, or a superior God with human distorted qualities. And I explained to him that even when times are unpleasant, that that time can be a defining time for you, so why not call it a blessing.

He agreed and continued his story and was a bit careful, knowing my interpretation of God.

After his story I encouraged him not to think lowly of the woman. I reminded him that its the holidays and not everyone remembers joy during these times. I reminded him that we have no idea what she's going through. But he kept coming back to the idea that her going off at him was "Sad". But then I told him that, maybe her going off was a release and that he shouldn't take it personal. Maybe she felt much better after the encounter.

I reminded him that he was better off feeling "good" about it then feeling bad, sorry or sad.

He didn't want to leave.

He says I look strikingly like his sister.

He tells me about how his sister's family invited him for Christmas Dinner and surprised him with his sister coming to town, a woman he hasn't seen in years.

He tells me about the gift that he got this woman after knowing her for a month or so. A new lover.

He tells me about his son, and how he seemingly lost him due to his battle with drugs. But because of the program that he's on, he's able to put his life together and is determined to get him back.

He tells me of his Mom.

Yeah, he didn't want to leave.

I really wanted to be alone, but then I thought to myself: this is a direct response from the universe. Peep my musings below on twitter. Start at the bottom.

Funny how the universe works... actually it ain't funny at all, its very on point.

Sunday, December 26, 2010

Has it really been 2 months since an update... MY BAD!

Been living a little bit though.

Sooooooo... where do I begin???

A couple of weeks ago, I planned on seeing a friend's daughter in a fashion show. I think she's 5 years old. I was all for it and could not wait to go a support.

The day of the show, I was leaving work a little late and opted to just show up at the end and bring the little model some flowers instead. You know, make her feel like the rockstar that she already is! :) The show started at 6, I'd get there by 7.

My friend told me the address, but I put the word east in front of the street name. She even corrected me the day of, but my mind was set on EAST... anyone who knows me knows that I stay "hopstoppin" it up cus I'm kind of directionless...

At 6:50pm, I'm in parkslope, BK when I shouldn't be. I don't know this yet. My friend's daughter was home-schooled the year before so by now I think that its perfectly fine that I am now ringing the doorbell of a brownstone and not a "school".

An elderly woman comes to the door and I immediately know that I made a mistake. I tell her where I am trying to go and what I was trying to do. The night before, I spent the night over a friends house who was styling me for my video shoot. I had a big garment bag, a bouquet of flowers, my computer case and maybe my green puma bag... Yeah, I was "bag lady" on this woman's stoop.

She explains to me that I should have gone to such-in-such (her home address without the "EAST" part). She explains that its actually a church with a school attached and that she attends the church. She tries to explain to me how to get there by train, but she notices the defeat in my eyes. She invites me in, and I say no and asked that she goes in to explain to me how to get to the train... it was cold. I was covered up. She explains a bit more, but then insists that I step in and have a seat. For a split second, I think to myself "please don't kill me"... lol the thought makes me giggle a bit as I'm sure she was thinking the same thing... but maybe not.

She asks me to sit and says something like "you must have a guardian angel". She hands me a bulletin from the church and says that perhaps its a good idea to call the place to see if the fashion show is still going on. In the meantime her son comes from upstairs to see whats going on. We explain what happened and that I'm lost and he seemed un-phased that a stranger was in the house just as the woman was. We exchange names... I don't remember his name at all. He offers me a water bottle.

Finally, as if to give up, the woman suggests that I take a car to the church instead of the train. She says I can get there in like 10 minutes as opposed to 30-45 minutes on the train. (where was I? was I that lost??). I ask how much it would be and they say about 8-9 dollars. I look in my pocket to see how much cash I have as I do not carry much. I pull out 9 dollars exactly. I pull it out with joy actually, as if to say "Thank God"... and the son pulls out a 5 as if to say, "nonsense young grasshopper, you'll need more just in case." They pretty much "make" me take the money. After a while it becomes hard to fight. I knew this was a blessing. I knew this was God. I knew she saw herself in me, and was helping herSelf.

She calls a car service for me and we wait a couple minutes. The son asked me what I did, I told him I was a singer and he immediately gets up, looking for a card of sorts. Says his cousin is a musician and loves soul music. Says that his cousin loves music in the vein of Erykah Badu. That made me smile really big as this man has never heard me sing before but already knew that I was Badu like.

My car is here. I stand up and express my gratitude and smile a lot and the woman has the nerve to give me a hug and kiss on the cheek... THE NERVE!!!

I missed the fashion show. My friend and her daughter had already left when I got there, but I'm not upset. I knew I was where I needed to be and everything happened as it should have that night. I needed this example. I needed to feel that I was divinely protected. At that very moment.

to be cont'd (and perhaps sooner then later).