Wednesday, April 1, 2009

love letters


Dear Nakia's nose,

I love you so much. You have been with me always, and I haven't loved you all ways. But today I do, I have made the decision to love you and to never change you. You're mine and you have never given up on me. Making fun of you in public hurt when others did it, and it doesn't feel too good when I do it along with them. I'm sorry, thank you for being a part of me.

Dear Nakia's eyes,

We have been through it. When I was little, I can remember sitting on my dad's lap bracing myself for when he ripped the adhesive patch off of one of you (righty). It hurt. That whole experience hurt. Trying to strengthen one of you, while the other was pretty weak too. Then wearing a contact in one eye while wearing thick glasses for both eyes- at the same time. It was a lot. I was never happy with you. But you stayed put, never failing completely. Always gave me exactly what I needed to get through the day. I have not lost hope for you, and do intend to heal myself. But for now, I love you. I acknowledge you. and I thank you for being with me. When I first saw my glasses, (the ones I wear today) I cried. But now, I prefer them. They need you right now, and I am happy to oblige. Thank you, and I love you.

Dear Nakia's Knees,

Throughout my dancer career, you have been very very important to me. But for whatever reason, I don't give you the attention you desperately need sometimes. You have given up on me a total of 3 times while dancing. And I have been dancing for more than a decade. But on the other hand you have given up on me while walking or sitting, countless times. And its all because I don't listen to you when I should. You don't have the support you need on top of the fact that I often rush. Well, knees, I love you, I decide to love you and will remember to stretch my I.T. bands so that you don't shift on me again. I will not be pissed when you shift. I will learn to listen to my body and what it needs. You deserve it. I love you.

Dear Nakia's Body,

You have been a beautiful home. Yet, I have not enjoyed you. Not fully. Eating fatty foods, working 7 days a week. Not getting rest. Not exercising. How do I expect you to keep working if I don't love and take care of you. I acknowledge that I am not you, or any of your limbs which I also love but rather I am with you in this present lifetime. And I appreciate being with you. I wish to stay here for a bit longer but I know to do so I must take care of you. I have been back and forth with my diet and I think its time to be discipline... in real life. Cutting meat out does not equate to eating healthy. Its gonna take more effort that that and I am willing to try try try again, and get it right before I move on to the next body in the next lifetime. You need you rest as well. All this 9-5 work isn't really helping you at all. Not the way you thought it would anyway, so why not take car of you in the process. I love you so much. I really want you to know that.

Dear Nakia's Mind,

We fight A LOT. And I'm tired of fighting. We need balance, Me (spirit), you (mind), and body. I have to learn to, or rather, DECIDE to enjoy this game we play, cuz right now, I am suffering, staying too much inside of you, not knowing what its like to be out of my mind. I have neglected to focus you as well. Not really having enough patience to meditate. We have had serious beef for the longest of time. And I'm ready to squash it. I love you. You are the most complex of them all at the moment. Always questioning and refuting. Creating negative scenes, enabling me to be mad about them... in real life. and you are not the bad guy here, I'm just saying that the time has come for you not to be so dominant. I have decided to be easy with you. It will be an effort, a huge one that I will have to make forever, but I am willing. I love you, and today I choose to be in "constant prayer" monitoring my thoughts, producing positivity. I am waking up every morning to ask my self, "self, what would YOU like to experience today?" and my actions will answer that. Today, I am conscious of what I am creating. and a negative mind, does not serve me. So I release thee, lovingly. I love you and I'm changing my mind.

Love all ways,

The spirit whom answers to Nakia

3 comments:

lm said...

Yay love letters...I dig it...it's okay to be out of your mind :-)

Abigail Ekue said...

My favs are the letters to your body and mind. "I love you but I'm changing my mind" very clever. You take care of your body and its good to you.

Continued growth.

sahboog said...

why i just got a text from your pink oe that said: "oh word?" (lol)