2006 rehearsal, bustin a gut with Dom :)
Saturday, June 26, 2010
day 11 of 21 DAY DETOX OF THE MIND
2006 rehearsal, bustin a gut with Dom :)
We are all multifaceted beings. And how many of us have taken full responsibility of what has happened to you in our lives? Really? When I know my thoughts are creative, when I know my worth, when I love me and take care of me, when it matters more to me how I feel, there are certain things that I DO, (see last entry on be-do-have). There have been times in the past where I have cried and have said words like, “you made me cry” or “she/he did this to me”. Now I understand that when ever I am down, I am out of alignment of who I really am. I have forgotten why I came forth to this extraordinary world, which is to experience, know, be and create who I really am. Because I have this awareness, it is sometimes hard for me to get back up, because I know on some level I put myself there. And yes, I can easily pick myself up, but let’s face it, its hard to stand when you are weak. I felt that way before I started this detox. I just kept reminding myself that it was temporary and that I have to connect to who I really am again and again… and again. It is a beautiful process of knowing, forgetting, remembering, knowing, forgetting, remembering.
But I am puling the strings in either allowing something to bother me, or not seeing the full picture of what has occurred.
If I practice knowing my worth, feeling good, loving me, taking care of me, I am projecting that into the universe. I attract just that. I see only that, because it exists very clearly in my mind first. I expect it. Its plain to see this with children, with friends, with co workers, with family. You hear others talk about them in a negative way: This child is wild/ I can’t stand Lisa, she always gossips/ here comes auntie Rose, always beggin. But when that child, or Lisa, or Rose comes and sits next to you, you have a totally different experience with them. That child is a joy, full of energy, wanting to love you and tell you of the greatness he’s discovered. Lisa is very comfortable with you and likes talking about life and the steps she’s taking to make her life better. Rose sees you and is very proud of what you’ve become. Proud to show you off to her friends on the block. She can’t stop smiling.
This is VERY true for me. I have no idea how these beings are when they are not with me. But I do know that it has a lot to do with the energy I carry. It has a lot to do with my expectations. So even if the child is “wild”, I know wild is a judgment based on past experiences of others and to think that of another aspect of God doesn’t really serve me. THAT child is not showing me “wild”. That child is showing me “wonder”. I know this because that is what I am looking for in that child. And who knows, maybe Lisa and Auntie Rose know that I don’t go for gossipin and beggin. They know this because they know that I know my worth. If you fed your children fruits and vegetables on a regular basis and was very diligent and specific in their quest to health and others see that, they wouldn't dare offer them a snickers without asking YOU first. It’s the same with you too. When you take care of you, when you MATTER to you, other see that and approach you in a like matter.
If my dominant thought about someone is, “He ain’t sh!t” then it will be impossible for me to see anything other than that in them. Not to mention (and I haven’t even started with this yet) WE ARE ONE! If I have that kind of thought about another, then on some level I am thinking that thought for me. Especially if I am truly effected by this person. It is certainly a reflection of me, as opposites do not attract. On top of all that, who feels “good” thinking those thoughts anyway?
Its starts inside, always. I practice the best in me so it’s not a task to see the best in others. And they bring it out when they are around me.
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3 comments:
i am striving to let go of expectations as i read your blog. i realize that this is providing a nourishment that i need now and should not project past just that. but i am scared! i find myself nervous thinking of your 21st day and hoping that you continue to write. i should not push my need upon you. if you reach your 21st day and decide that you no longer need to write this, i should say "thanks" and take it for what it was...
but, please continue to write :)
Love, I will always write, probably not in this traditional way, but I am a singer, and an artist. I share everything usually. I started this 21 day detox to gain a habit. I wanted to habitually check in with me. To reconnect to my source. If you take anything from me, take this: you have a source as well. There is a part of you that is not broken; that is not harmed and will never be. Find that and give it focus, give it your energy and see what happens next, DonnyElle.
Thank you for sharing and please pass this along to whoever could use it.
Ase
thanks! you are correct, i know. often, it's easier to focus on someone else, & tag along as a voyeur on their journey. but yes, i have begun to remember as well. & will do! i have already begun singing your praises ;)
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